99 Inspirational Quotes

A man whose life has been dishonourable is not entitled to escape disgrace in death.

Indeed, wretched the man whose fame makes his misfortunes famous.

Let them hate so long as they fear.

The best cure for hypochondria is to forget about your body and get interested in someone else’s.

I keep reading between the lies.

TV – a clever contraction derived from the words Terrible Vaudeville. However, it is our latest medium – we call it a medium because nothing’s well done.

Moon rocks are OK when everyone is eating.

I would have answered your letter sooner, but you didn’t send one.

Politics makes estranged bedfellows.

The career of a writer is comparable to that of a woman of easy virtue. You write first for pleasure, later for the pleasure of others, and finally for money.

Time wounds all heels.

When old people speak it is not because of the sweetness of words in our mouths; it is because we see something which we do not see.

When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped.

The bedfellows politics made are never strange. It only seems that way to those who have not watched the courtship.

The home wasn’t built in a day.

Women like silent men. They think they’re listening.

The damage done in one year can sometimes take ten or twenty years to repair.

When suffering knocks at your door and you say there is no seat for him, he tells you not to worry because he has brought his own stool.

The only thing we have learned from experience is that we learn nothing from experience.

A man who makes trouble for others is also making trouble for himself.

They have not always elected the best leaders, particularly after a long period in which they have not used this facility of free election. You tend to lose the habit.

The whole idea of a stereotype is to simplify. Instead of going through the problem of all this great diversity – that it’s this or maybe that – you have just one large statement; it is this.

Nigeria is what it is because its leaders are not what they should be.

People create stories create people; or rather stories create people create stories.

One of the truest tests of integrity is its blunt refusal to be compromised.

Nigera is what it is because its leaders are not what they should be.

Negotiation in the classic diplomatic sense assumes parties are more anxious to agree than to disagree.

Art is man’s constant effort to create for himself a different order of reality from that which is given to him.

Democracy is not something you put away for ten years, and then in the 11th year, you wake up and start practicing again. We have to begin to learn to rule ourselves again.

Stories serve the purpose of consolidating whatever gains people or their leaders have made or imagine they have made in their existing journey through the world.

No people in history have ever survived who thought they could protect their freedom by making themselves inoffensive to their enemies.

The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day at a time.

The first requirement of a statesman is that he be dull.

The great corrupter of public man is the ego. Looking at the mirror distracts one’s attention from the problem.

Negotiating in the classic diplomatic sense assumes parties are more anxious to agree than to disagree.

The manner in which one endures what must be endured is more important than the thing that must be endured.

I will undoubtedly have to seek what is happily known as gainful employment, which I am glad to say does not describe holding public office.

Washington is like a self-sealing tank on a military aircraft. When a bullet passes through, it closes up.

The greatest mistake I made was not to die in office.

I understand that postmodern literature probably means people like DeLillo, and The Fiction Collective, but I don’t get it that those writers are really influenced by postmodern theorists.

If we learn the art of yielding what must be yielded to the changing present, we can save the best of the past.

I learned from the example of my father that the manner in which one endures what must be endured is more important than the thing that must be endured.

Great Britain has lost an empire and has not yet found a role.

Controversial proposals, once accepted, soon become hallowed.

Always remember that the future comes one day at a time.

A memorandum is written not to inform the reader but to protect the writer.

We have actively sought and are actively seeking to make the United Nations an effective instrument of international cooperation.

It is worse than immoral, it’s a mistake.

On the surface we all act like we all love each other and we’re free and easy, and actually, we’re far more moralistic than any other society I’ve ever lived in.

Traveling around I don’t think people are that horrible, I think they just don’t know.

I write it to get it out of me. I don’t write it to remember it.

I’m very staid compared to my students, actually.

One of the reasons I think the ultra-right-wing has such power in this country is that no one talks out.

On the surface, we all act like we all love each other and we’re free and easy, and actually, we’re far more moralistic than any other society I’ve ever lived in.

Some of the stuff about Yogi energy is really fascinating.

We’ve been very bad at understanding why the right wing does things.

I understand that when people read my books there’s something there – but I don’t identify with it.

There’s a backlash against womyn that’s really bad right now.

That’s why the right wing is good at figuring out the left wing.

We get on the bandwagon in all sorts of ways – you know minor ways and major ways – like what you’ve just encountered which isn’t censorship exactly, it was something sort of uglier in a way.

I’m really fascinated and you know I’ve been wondering about that usage of language, various breathing techniques, and why in these practices language is being used in another way.

Well, fear and homophobia are both pervasive.

Well, I think writing is basically about time and rhythm. Like with jazz. You have your basic melody and then you just riff off of it. And the riffs are about timing.

Yeah, I mean, I put work out there for people to use and I’m grateful when you use it.

You can do whatever you want with my work.

You know I’ve had work banned.

The literary culture, if you examine it, the high literary culture is that which preserves the government and you know it’s really the talk for those who have.

But I still don’t have a clear idea of what my voice is.

I wasn’t really into body piercings until I found that about half my female students had them.

And I’m working at trying to find a kind of language where I won’t be so easily modulated by expectation.

I understand that postmodern literature probably means people like DeLillo and The Fiction Collective, but I don’t get it that those writers are really influenced by postmodern theorists.

But guys such as Allen and William are more supportive than most men.

I think the best thing in cases of censorship or things like this is to get as much media as possible.

First of all, writing at best – certainly fiction writing – more and more I think is magic.

I found my voice was a reaction to all that voice stuff.

I mean, once work’s out there it’s meant to be used.

I mean, they censor your work when they’re scared of it.

I might be writing what people expect me to write, writing from that place where I might be ruled by economic considerations. To overcome that, I started working with my dreams, because I’m not so censored when I use dream material.

Internalization is used in this country as a very effective political tool.

I just thought it was unconscionable for Congress to insert itself into this debate. We are particularly unqualified to make that decision and to intrude ourselves into the lives of this family.

And internalization is used in this country as a very effective political tool.

I don’t want to get to the end of my life and find that I lived just the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well.

It began in mystery, and it will end in mystery, but what a savage and beautiful country lies in between.

Look in the mirror. The face that pins you with its double gaze reveals a chastening secret.

Nothing is more memorable than a smell. One scent can be unexpected, momentary and fleeting, yet conjure up a childhood summer beside a lake in the mountains.

Touch seems to be as essential as sunlight.

Success produces success, just as money produces money.

A poem records emotions and moods that lie beyond normal language, that can only be patched together and hinted at metaphorically.

Everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees on just what it is.

I don’t want to be a passenger in my own life.

We live on the leash of our senses.

If a jerk burns the flag, America is not threatened, democracy is not under siege, and freedom is not at risk.

I’m in favor of immigration but we also need rules.

Sometimes people who are Jewish are held to a higher standard which we take great pride in.

India is a regional power. It does not need anything to establish it.

No, you can’t call your vote in. You have to be there on the floor to vote.

My father is an actor, so he brought me into his agency when I was young. It wasn’t something I wanted to do until high school when I started taking theater and really liked it. Then an agent found me and wanted me to come out to Los Angeles and give it a shot. I gave myself six months, but it only took me like a week to get a job.

We have some Jewish members of Congress, not a lot but there’s a bunch of us.

We have to have some rules and regulations in America, or the world would empty out here.

I am always fascinated by India.

I used to be scared of uncertainty; now I get a high out of it.

I consider myself a non-denominational Christian. I grew up in a Bible church and still hold those beliefs very close to me.

I love the smell of shampoo on a girl’s hair. You can walk past someone and be like, ‘Wow, you took a shower this morning, didn’t you? Because you smell lovely!’

The worst gift that I ever gave a girl was a suitcase for Christmas. As in, ‘I can’t think of anything to give you, but here’s a new suitcase.’ Afterward, I was like, ‘What were you thinking, idiot?’

I was in preschool and a girl actually kissed me on the cheek. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what it meant, so I instantly grabbed her face and kissed her on the lips. And, then I got suspended.

I’m from Texas, and I would love to do an old-fashioned gun-slinging Western.

I question: do we really understand the differences between modernism and postmodernism?

I’m not Mr. Debonair Suave. I’m just a regular boy who goofs around, pulls pranks, and makes jokes. That doesn’t sound very hot to me.

There are just certain things that turn my head. It may be a girl’s sense of humor, it may be her wit or her belief system; it could be a lot of different things.

What I enjoy most is traveling to different places and meeting new people. For me, it’s all about life experiences, and I’m very grateful that acting allows me so many interesting and fulfilling ones.

When I was in middle school, some of my so-called friends found a catalog ad I did for Superman pajamas. They made as many copies as they could and pasted them up all over the school.

When we started, we knew the show was going to be hit or miss, and we needed to find a core audience to really make us survive. And I think we’ve been able to do that.

I get nervous around girls for the first time. Once I’m in, I can take the reins and go. It’s just the initial approach I’m really bad at.

What I enjoy most is travelling to different places and meeting new people. For me, it’s all about life experiences, and I’m very grateful that acting allows me so many interesting and fulfilling ones.

Murderers will try to recall the sequence of events, they will remember exactly what they did just before and just after. But they can never remember the actual moment of killing. This is why they will always leave a clue.

Inspirational Quotes

The biographies and autobiographies are on the whole more impressive than the fiction of the last two decades, but the freakish best sellers among them are least likely to withstand the test of time.

So often is the virgin sheet of paper more real than what one has to say, and so often one regrets having marred it.

History provides neither compensation for suffering nor penalties for wrong.

The most certain test by which we judge whether a country is really free is the amount of security enjoyed by minorities.

The greatest men, you can quote for everything.

The fate of every democracy, of every government based on the sovereignty of the people, depends on the choices it makes between these opposite principles, absolute power on the one hand, and on the other the restraints of legality and the authority of tradition.

Save for the wild force of Nature, nothing moves in this world that is not Greek in its origin.

Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Liberty is the prevention of control by others.

If the past has been an obstacle and a burden, knowledge of the past is the safest and the surest emancipation.

Far from being the product of a democratic revolution and of an opposition to English institutions, the constitution of the United States was the result of a powerful reaction against democracy, and in favor of the traditions of the mother country.

By liberty, I mean the assurance that every man shall be protected in doing what he believes is his duty against the influence of authority and majorities, custom, and opinion.

By a series of violent shocks, the nations in succession have struggled to shake off the Past, to reverse the action of Time and the verdict of success, and to rescue the world from the reign of the dead.

Be not content with the best book; seek sidelights from the others; have no favorites.

Everything secret degenerates, even the administration of justice; nothing is safe that does not show how it can bear discussion and publicity.

I’ve made a deal with the devil. He said he’s going to give me an air-conditioned place when I go down there if I go there, so I won’t put all the fires out.

Liberty is the condition of duty, the guardian of conscience. It grows as conscience grows. The domains of both grow together. Liberty is safety from all hindrances, even sin. So Liberty ends by being Free Will.

History is not a burden on the memory but an illumination of the soul.

I’m not a driven businessman, but a driven artist. I never think about money. Beautiful things make money.

If some great catastrophe is not announced every morning, we feel a certain void. Nothing in the paper today, we sigh.

Learn as much by writing as by reading.

Liberty is not a means to a higher political end. It is itself the highest political end.

Liberty is not the power of doing what we like, but the right to do what we ought.

Machiavelli’s teaching would hardly have stood the test of Parliamentary government, for public discussion demands at least the profession of good faith.

Property is not a sacred right. When a rich man becomes poor it is a misfortune, it is not a moral evil. When a poor man becomes destitute, it is a moral evil, teeming with consequences and injurious to society and morality.

And remember, where you have a concentration of power in a few hands, all too frequently men with the mentality of gangsters get control. History has proven that.

Power tends to corrupt and absolute power corrupts absolutely.

A wise person does at once, what a fool does at last. Both do the same thing; only at different times.

Save for the wild force of Nature, nothing moves in this world that is not Greek in its origin.

Socialism means slavery.

The danger is not that a particular class is unfit to govern: every class is unfit to govern.

There are two things that cannot be attacked in front: ignorance and narrow-mindedness. They can only be shaken by the simple development of the contrary qualities. They will not bear discussion.

The long-term versus the short-term argument is one used by losers.

The issue that has swept down the centuries and which will have to be fought sooner or later is the people versus the banks.

The one pervading evil of democracy is the tyranny of the majority, or rather of that party, not always the majority, that succeeds, by force or fraud, in carrying elections.

The science of politics is the one science that is deposited by the streams of history, like the grains of gold in the sand of a river; and the knowledge of the past, the record of truths revealed by experience, is eminently practical, as an instrument of action and a power that goes to making the future.

I’ve made a deal with the devil. He said he’s going to give me an air-conditioned place when I go down there, if I go there, so I won’t put all the fires out.

There is no error so monstrous that it fails to find defenders among the ablest men.

There is not a soul who does not have to beg alms of another, either a smile, a handshake, or a fond eye.

To be able to look back upon one’s past life with satisfaction is to live twice.

Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Don’t be a blueprint. Be an original.

I don’t owe one man one cent. Anywhere.

Put your trust in the Lord and go ahead. Worry gets you no place.

The greatest thing the Democrats have ever done for me was to defeat me for the governor of Tennessee.

The chief executive who knows his strengths and weaknesses as a leader is likely to be far more effective than the one who remains blind to them.

A little of what you call frippery is very necessary for looking like the rest of the world.

I’ve got too many of my friends that retired and went home and got on a rocking chair, and about a year and a half later, I’m always going to the cemetery.

If you think it’s expensive to hire a professional to do the job, wait until you hire an amateur.

It scares you: all the noise, the rattling, the shaking. But the look on everybody’s face when you’re finished and packing, it’s the best smile in the world; and there’s nobody hurt, and the well’s under control.

Misery’s fine – as long as you know you can get out of it when you want to.

Things always happen in series.

Passive pleasure is no pleasure at all.

The only thing to know is how to use your neurosis.

Learning is not attained by chance, it must be sought for with ardor and diligence.

I’ve always felt that a person’s intelligence is directly reflected by the number of conflicting points of view he can entertain simultaneously on the same topic.

Arbitrary power is like most other things which are very hard, and very liable to be broken.

If we mean to have heroes, statesmen, and philosophers, we should have learned women.

Do not put such unlimited power into the hands of husbands. Remember all men would be tyrants if they could.

Great necessities call out great virtues.

Well, knowledge is a fine thing, and Mother Eve thought so; but she smarted so severely for hers, that most of her daughters have been afraid of it since.

I begin to think, that calm is not desirable in any situation in life. The man was made for action and for bustle too, I believe.

If particular care and attention are not paid to the ladies, we are determined to foment a rebellion, and will not hold ourselves bound by any laws in which we have no voice or representation.

Opinions alter, manners change, and creeds rise and fall, but the moral laws are written on the table of eternity.

Inspirational Quotes

Wisdom and penetration are the fruit of experience, not the lessons of retirement and leisure. Great necessities call out great virtues.

Well, I just figure any man who risks his neck to save a dog’s life isn’t going to kill someone for gold teeth.

I am more and more convinced that man is a dangerous creature and that power, whether vested in many or a few, is ever grasping, and like the grave, cries, ‘Give, give.’

In my experience, problems most frequently arise from those who report for television, with little field experience in your area but an insatiable appetite for a sound bite.

Well I just figure any man who risks his neck to save a dog’s life isn’t going to kill someone for gold teeth.

My view is different. Public relations are a key component of any operation in this day of instant communications and rightly inquisitive citizens.

I am convinced that dealing intelligently with the press is of the greatest importance to the success and effectiveness of a humanitarian mission.

We have too many high-sounding words and too few actions that correspond with them.

Appreciate the power of rumor, often malicious, no matter how preposterous, within the local populations you are seeking to help.

Unfortunately, the attitude of many towards the press, humanitarians included and especially government workers, is often one of suspicion, if not outright fear.

I didn’t get into acting to have a moment, I got into it because of people who’ve inspired me, like Judi Dench, Holly Hunter, and Jodie Foster.

Most of the time it’s the parents who recognise me. They try to tell their kids, ‘Look, it’s Giselle,’ and I say, ‘No, no, no, don’t ruin this for them,’ because I’m usually standing there with my hair sideways and no make-up on. And the kid is saying, ‘That is not Giselle. No way. That is some worn-out girl who really needs a bath.’

I’m pretty Sicilian if I’ve been crossed. I don’t seek revenge, but I never forget. And I make it hard to repair, which is not a great quality because if people held me to that standard, no one would be around me – ever.

When I died my hair red the first time, I felt as if it was what nature intended. I have been accused of being a bit of a spitfire, so in that way, I absolutely live up to the stereotype. The red hair suits my personality. I was a terrible blonde!

My job as an actress is to make things work and come up with reasons of my own and not just fill in the blanks for anybody else, you know what I mean?

I’m one of seven kids. That’ll keep your ego in check.

I was the dork in high school who sang musical numbers up and down the hallways.

I think a lot of times we don’t pay enough attention to people with a positive attitude because we assume they are naive or stupid or unschooled.

I do love shoes that make my legs longer. I have the upper body of someone who’s 5ft 8in, so high heels help me even out the discrepancy.

I always had a larger view. I’m interested in real life – my family, my friends. I have tried never to define myself by my success, whatever that is. My happiness is way beyond roles and awards.

How I work is I work from of very character-driven place. And I trust the writers.

As an actress people always tease me like: if there’s anything you can do to make yourself unattractive you will do it.

I like Cinderella, I really do. She has a good work ethic. I appreciate a good, hard-working gal. And she likes shoes. The fairy tale is all about the shoe at the end, and I’m a big shoe girl.

Dodging and burning are steps to take care of mistakes God made in establishing tonal relationships.

I tried to keep both arts alive, but the camera won. I found that while the camera does not express the soul, perhaps a photograph can!

Landscape photography is the supreme test of the photographer – and often the supreme disappointment.

It is my intention to present – through the medium of photography – intuitive observations of the natural world which may have meaning to the spectators.

It is horrifying that we have to fight our own government to save the environment.

Sometimes I do get to places just when God’s ready to have somebody click the shutter.

In my mind’s eye, I visualize how a particular… sight and feeling will appear on a print. If it excites me, there is a good chance it will make a good photograph. It is an intuitive sense, an ability that comes from a lot of practice.

A good photograph is knowing where to stand.

There is nothing worse than a sharp image of a fuzzy concept.

To photograph truthfully and effectively is to see beneath the surface and record the qualities of nature and humanity that live or are latent in all things.

When I’m ready to take a photograph, I think I quite obviously see in my mind’s eye something that is not literally there in the true meaning of the word. I’m interested in something which is built up from within, rather than just extracted from without.

Some photographers take reality… and impose the domination of their own thought and spirit. Others come before reality more tenderly and a photograph to them is an instrument of love and revelation.

Photography, as a powerful medium of expression and communication, offers an infinite variety of perceptions, interpretations, and executions.

Photography is more than a medium for factual communication of ideas. It is a creative art.

Not everybody trusts paintings but people believe photographs.

A photograph is usually looked at – seldom looked into.

Myths and creeds are heroic struggles to comprehend the truth in the world.

No man has the right to dictate what other men should perceive, create, or produce, but all should be encouraged to reveal themselves, their perceptions, and emotions, and to build confidence in the creative spirit.

The negative is comparable to the composer’s score and the print to its performance. Each performance differs in subtle ways.

A true photograph need not be explained, nor can it be contained in words.

We must remember that a photograph can hold just as much as we put into it, and no one has ever approached the full possibilities of the medium.

No man has the right to dictate what other men should perceive, create, or produce, but all should be encouraged to reveal themselves, their perceptions and emotions, and to build confidence in the creative spirit.

Twelve significant photographs in any one year is a good crop.

In wisdom gathered over time, I have found that every experience is a form of exploration.

When words become unclear, I shall focus on photographs. When images become inadequate, I shall be content with silence.

Yosemite Valley, to me, is always a sunrise, a glitter of green and golden wonder in a vast edifice of stone and space.

You don’t take a photograph, you make it.

The only things in my life that compatibly exist with this grand universe are the creative works of the human spirit.

To photograph truthfully and effectively is to see beneath the surface and record the qualities of nature and humanity which live or are latent in all things.

The negative is the equivalent of the composer’s score and the print of the performance.

A great photograph is one that fully expresses what one feels, in the deepest sense, about what is being photographed.

There are always two people in every picture: the photographer and the viewer.

There are worlds of experience beyond the world of the aggressive man, beyond history, and beyond science. The moods and qualities of nature and the revelations of great art are equally difficult to define; we can grasp them only in the depths of our perceptive spirit.

There are no rules for good photographs, there are only good photographs.

One friend in a lifetime is much; two are many; three are hardly possible. Friendship needs a certain parallelism of life, a community of thought, a rivalry of aim.

If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family Anatidae on our hands.

Millions of men have lived to fight, build palaces and boundaries, and shape destinies and societies; but the compelling force of all times has been the force of originality and creation profoundly affecting the roots of the human spirit.

I got in trouble with the police, and that was a rude awakening. That was it. I’d seen the bottom of the pit, and it was time to scrape myself out of it.

Trying to manage diabetes is hard because if you don’t, there are consequences you’ll have to deal with later in life.

I only write music for myself, I don’t try and appeal to anyone else.

I always knew I’d be in music in some sort of capacity. I didn’t know if I’d be successful at it, but I knew I’d be doing something in it. Maybe get a job in a record store. Maybe even play in a band. I never got into this to be a star.

There’s a saying, ‘It’s easy to write songs, but very difficult to write great songs.’ I’m going through that right now.

We can’t live without taxes, but we sure would like to have good ones.

Rulers do not reduce taxes to be kind. Expediency and greed create high taxation, and normally it takes an impending catastrophe to bring it down.

No student ever attains very eminent success by simply doing what is required of him: it is the amount and excellence of what is over and above the required, that determines the greatness of ultimate distinction.

No one ever attains success by simply doing what is required of him.

In all parts of the Old World, as well as of the New, it was evident that Columbus had kindled a fire in every mariner’s heart. That fire was the harbinger of a new era, for it was not to be extinguished.

I was married awfully young and I felt trapped. My wife had been divorced and all the time we were married we were out of the Church. It wasn’t until we were divorced that we became good Catholics again.

Sometimes I wonder how I got into comedy at all.

Maxwell is serious, dedicated, awkward, forgetful, pompous to a certain degree, sentimental.

In the beginning, the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.

Politics, as a practice, whatever its profession, has always been the systematic organization of hatred.

I like getting married, but I don’t like being married.

I did movie star impressions as a kid in high school. Somehow they just got out of hand.

It was a special show that became a cult classic of sorts, and I made a lot of money for it.

I don’t believe it. Prove it to me and I still won’t believe it.

The mere thought hadn’t even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.

The impossible often has a kind of integrity that the merely improbable lacks.

There is a theory that states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

There is a theory that states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

Life is wasted on the living.

The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

I am a quick study – I can memorize a script in an hour – but I can’t remember a name in three seconds. I’ve even forgotten my wife’s name on occasion.

The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.

The difficulty with this conversation is that it’s very different from most of the ones I’ve had of late. Which, as I explained, have mostly been with trees.

This must be on Thursday. I never could get the hang of Thursdays.

I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.

It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.

Isn’t it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too?

Space is big. You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it’s a long way down the road to the drugstore, but that’s just peanuts to space.

In order to fly, all one must do is simply miss the ground.

If somebody thinks they’re a hedgehog, presumably you just give ’em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves.

It is a rare mind indeed that can render the hitherto non-existent blindingly obvious. The cry ‘I could have thought of that’ is a very popular and misleading one, for the fact is that they didn’t, and a very significant and revealing fact it is too.

I’m spending a year dead for tax reasons.

It is a well-known fact that those people who must want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it… anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.

I seldom end up where I wanted to go, but almost always end up where I need to be.

In the beginning, the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher… or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.

He hoped and prayed that there wasn’t an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn’t an afterlife.

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime is doubly so.

Time is bunk.

To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity and integrity.

We have normality. I repeat, we have normality. Anything you still can’t cope with is therefore your own problem.

You live and learn. At any rate, you live.

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family Anatidae on our hands.

You aren’t going to leave me alone, are you?

Well, we could tell them that we’re here on an archeological expedition.

What this country needs is a good five-cent nickel.

We have nothing in our history or position to invite aggression; we have everything to beckon us to the cultivation of relations of peace and amity with all nations.

Nothing is more responsible for the good old days than a bad memory.

Middle age occurs when you are too young to take up golf and too old to rush up to the net.

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